I can honestly say, with all my heart, I have been blessed with some amazing friends. I could spend days writing odes to the people I cherish but for today I want to single out a certain individual. I personally feel, we as humans, do not spend enough time telling the people we love how much they mean to us. It seems we save that for eulogies at funerals yet by this point it is all too late. Why not say living eulogies daily? Where they can have an impact on the lives of the ones we love. So this is my goal of the morning and perhaps the start of something more regular, even in my own life.
My living eulogy of the day goes out to Heather Fulfer. For those of you who are acquainted with this amazing young woman already know the amount of awesomeness she possesses. Spend just a small amount of time with her and quickly you will realize her hilarity, quick wit and immeasurable kindness. If you are having a bad day or just need someone to bring a smile to your face, she will find a way to bring light to your day. She is thoughtful of others and identifies quickly with your circumstances; bringing comfort without judgment. She has been through more trying circumstances than a lot of people I know, yet she does not make herself a victim or a hero. She walks through those trials with strength and steadfast assurance that her God will turn ALL things for the good. She goes out of her way for the broken and lonely. She cares for the unwanted and the elderly (which unfortunately can be both). Heather has a way of lighting up a room with her presence and can bring a smile to even the stoniest of hearts. Some of the craziest things pop out of her mouth, unguarded and untamed; sometimes having to take her foot out of her mouth but it is a characteristic I would never want to change in her. She is spontaneous and always ready for an adventure...or mischief. Need someone's house toilet papered or a drive-by mooning? She is your gal ;) Despite her fun-loving nature, she bears a deep authenticity. She does not have to be someone she is not to gain approval from someone or fit in. Accept her for who she is and she will love you unconditionally and walk loyally beside you.
Thank you for all you have been to me in my life, Heather. I could not ask for a better friend. Now, in return, I want you to wake up every morning and see all these things you possess. Look past any insecurities, scrutiny, shortcomings and anything else that may cause you to alter your perception of who you truly are. Continue in perseverance in your faith. At the end of the day, Christ is all that matters. The world and its opinions of you change from day to day, but His word never fails; His love never fails. Give in to the purposes of the Kingdom and ignore the criticisms of the day. Challenge yourself. Live fully and listen to His still, small voice. Remember the gifts, talents and abilities you were born to do, all you have are tools to work with but let Christ instruct you on how to use those most effectively. You are beautiful, worthy, talented, strong and bold! Always look forward. Sometimes the objects in the mirror of our past may look closer than they appear, but they are just that: our past. Love you so much and believe in you more than I can articulate on this page. I leave you with two quotes, both I am sure you have heard:
"Never let anyone make you feel inferior without your consent" -Eleanor Roosevelt
"The Lord is my light and my salvation--whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life--of whom shall I be afraid?" Psalm 27:1
So, as many of you all are well informed of by now, Matt and I got married December 29, 2012. After almost three months of pure wedded bliss (I know, we are old timers now), I realized I never did a wedding blog. I know, I know, sharing endless Facebook posts and pictures during the time wasn't enough to satisfy me nor did I think it was satisfying enough for you, the readers of this highly popularized blog. Although I kid around, I really do have some remarks regarding the experience of the whole night. Matt and I both realized our wedding day was the wedding we never thought we would want to have. We considered the whole court house wedding, not out of disdain for our family and friends, but we are both pretty laid back people, who didn't want to make a huge fuss over our decision to marry. Plus we did not want to impose the financial burden upon anyone. After talks with family (my mom), we decided to have an actual ceremony. I wanted the ceremony and reception to be relatively simple and I did not want it to cost a fortune. I personally think weddings are stupid expensive!
Once the wedding planning process unfolded, Matt and I were astonished by the support we received from so many people. People all over the place, offered time, money and talent to help with our wedding. We were so overwhelmed with gratitude. We knew these people loved us, but it really shows you the amount of love people have when they are willing to personally sacrifice in some way for you! I want to thank some of those people at the end, even though, almost all of them have already received a thank you card, I want to publicly recognize their efforts.
Star Barn is the venue we decided upon, because of its size and cost and it turned out to be a perfect venue, even for a winter wedding. My mother was the mastermind behind a majority of the decor and she did wonderfully. See, I was in school full time and trying to plan a wedding in four months (yes, I did that to myself) but she kicked butt in keeping me organized and on top of things. When the day did arrive, everything came together beautifully! I kept telling myself to not stress over the details but trust that all would fall into place and it did. It even began to snow as I was awaiting my grand entrance, that to me, was a little gift from heaven. Nothing could replace the love and experience of that night. Getting to be surrounded by those I love so much and getting to become the wife to the man of my dreams was a literal dream come true. And for those who have known me for quite some time, know that I was never the girl to plan my wedding or dream about my husband--this all was truly the night I never knew I wanted.
Special Thanks:
My parents: for all the support (financial and emotional), the wedding planning, letting me live with you guys while I was engaged and all the hard work you two put in. Love you so much!! This includes you Pat & Judy :)
Josh & Steph: for all the pictures you took Steph, for buying the meat for the wedding and helping with set up/tear down. And Jim and Josh for building our beautiful trellis!
Jack & Laury: Laury for making that beautiful cake and for your guys' help with buying the meat and help with set up/tear down.
Wade & Jody: for praying over us during communion and helping set up/tear down
Sean & Jess: for helping set up and tear down and Jess for being a bridesmaid
Jordan & Jess: for all your help throughout the process and Jess for doing hair for the bridesmaids.
Jake: for doing our marriage counseling and officiating our wedding
Randy: for helping the wedding weekend, you kicked butt with the details!!
Lori & Daria: For making all the bouquets for the bridesmaids and hosting the rehearsal dinner, all out of your own pocket. And your neighbors for helping.
Darrel & Heidi: for catering our reception and paying for all the side dishes!
Brittaney: for your help doing hair and helping with the details
Katy: for making all the invitations
Steve: for buying the keg for the reception
Marte: for praying over us during communion
Sarah T.: for making all my bridesmaids wonderful little gifts, they loved them!
and of course, all of our wonderful bridesmaids and groomsmen--you all were so wonderful and helpful with the whole thing. We love you all so much! And thank you to everyone else who helped, big or small, and came to our wedding. You made our day!! We could not invite everyone we wanted but we love you all too! Now, Costa Rican honeymoon in May! Stay tuned...
Oddly enough, I received three comments this summer about my feminine transformation. I am not sure statistically the odds of those occurrences but I would say it is enough to grab my attention. These comments caused me to reflect several years back to a time when teenage angst consumed my identity whilst in pursuit of said identity. Many of you reading this can clearly recall a time in my life where skate shoes and brands were my choice clothes, punk rock my musical selection, and my hair underwent a wide variety of color transformations most noticeably blue-black (which broke my mom's heart; her blonde haired little girl, gone). Snowboarding was the only way of life and a skateboard always in tote, even though I never got all that good. I never missed a party or a chance to have a good time or a good punk show. I did not like a lot of things most people would consider "girly"; I hated purses (I carried a wallet), thought shopping was a waste of time, heels...you could forget about it! I had friends that were girls but outside of those, I did not connect with a lot of girls. If you didn't snowboard, skate or do anything that required getting dirty and the outdoors, in my mind, I had nothing in common with you. The last thing I wanted to talk about was clothes, decorating, having babies and what my wedding day would look like. And do not get me started on the girl's at parties that wore the most revealing clothes just to get the guys' attention. If you did not have a personality to get you noticed, then I just felt bad for you because all you were going to get was "humped and dumped". Most of my friend's were guys because I felt most comfortable talking with them. We could talk about football, snowboarding and other similar things.
When I became a Christian and started going to church, I felt the gap between other women and I widen even more! I looked around and did not see another girl with piercings on their face, snowboard clothes or any indicators of those with an "alternative" lifestyle. I was embarrassed of anything considered truly feminine. I had created a lifestyle and mindset that because of the extra curricular activities I partook in there was not a whole lot of room for femininity. I thought the idea of being feminine was a weakness and altogether bore a vapid exterior; feminine women were sheep and had no originality. Slowly I conformed to being more of what I thought was a girl. I bought a pair of heels and more feminine clothes but still felt out of place and my mindset towards women had not changed all that much. I learned to respect and get along more with other women who I did not initially have much commonality with. Finally it hit me, I realized there had to be other girls out there that felt the same way. Girls who loved the outdoors and sports, but did not have other female friends to share these interests with and much to my surprise, there were a lot of girls like this!! So I started up groups like a girl's outdoor group and more recently within the snowboard community, collaborated with other female riders to create an actual unified and cohesive community.
For those of you who have known me within the last few years, you probably find this blog as a shock simply because I love hanging out with girls these days! I do not care what your interests are or where you come from, I sincerely love being around women. I have found there is a dynamic when women stop judging one another, comparing themselves or singling out based on appearance or interests. I have learned to become comfortable and love being a woman! I love shopping and clothes, but I also love the outdoors and do not mind rolling up my sleeves for hard work. I have learned there is no ONE way to be a woman outside of loving yourself! Enjoy who you were created to be and do not limit your thinking by contorting your ideas of what something should be. Looking back, if I continued on my path of limited thinking, I would not have some of the friendships I have now because I would have automatically written them off. How crazy is that?! So in summation, I think people have commented on my transformation because I have embraced the beauty of womanhood instead of casting it off. Plus, since my partying days I have dropped some pounds, so that may have helped, lol. Either way, love being a woman, ladies--it is what you were born to be! Much love to you all!
I cannot tell you how many times I have found myself within the academic circle and have been told that science is one's religion. In essence, they are making the assertion that their faith system is based upon scientific discovery and observation. Personally, despite possible popular opinion, I love science! In fact, I have wanted to be a geologist for years but mathematics is not my strong suit so I went with my other academic passion: history and philosophy. As a Christian, despite popular opinion, I believe science and God make a wonderful union. Science and God for centuries went hand in hand and some would say that in earlier times religion was science. The pendulum started to swing in the opposite direction and the two split most noticeably during the Enlightenment, which in all honesty, I am sympathetic towards. For centuries, religion (especially in Europe) was the dominant power force; breeding corruption and controlling the people to pursue its own agenda that was not always theologically based. But my blog is not that of a historical inquiry, yet a philosophical one.
I have been thinking of this phrase "science is my religion" and had a string of thoughts. Now bear with me, this is a matter of philosophical opinion and my goal is not even to debunk this phrase in question, yet shed some introspective light. The goal of science through the scientific method is to continually disprove until one can no longer disprove and hopefully this leads to facts or laws. As we all can agree, science is a constantly evolving thing in the sense that it is always progressing. What scientists knew about the body in the 1600's is not what we know today, yet people considered these ideas during that century as truth, until it was debunked or new discovery sprang forth. This same idea will be relevant a hundred years from now; the scientific evidence many adhere to as truth now may very well be discredited in the future. So here is my question: if science is an evolving/progressive area of study, is it possible to say that the beliefs one asserts as truth now could very well be wrong, based on the pattern of science in years past? Let me iterate, I am not saying that all science is wrong or that you, the reader, is wrong. For most of us, even within the faith realm, a majority of our knowledge is received. Most of us are not in the trenches discovering these ideas or truths nor have first-hand experience, so we are placing trust into the hands of professionals who have doctorate degrees to inform the populous. I used to laugh and say that many atheists think they are scientists and a lot Christians think they are theologians. I can even reconcile that religion and sects of religion have changed dramatically over the years based upon interpretation, but the one thing that remains is God's word to reference.
I remember reading a quote by C.S. Lewis some time back and it was not until recently I understood its tenets. He said, “A young man who wishes to remain a sound atheist cannot be too careful of his reading". I do not think even the atheist can argue with this statement, because its nature is truth. If science is what one ascribes to, one best be careful of what they adopt as truth or fact. Without an anchor in which to return to in reference to one's belief system, one is susceptible to the research of other individuals, who could turn out to very well be wrong. Just a thought...
Thank you for all you have been to me in my life, Heather. I could not ask for a better friend. Now, in return, I want you to wake up every morning and see all these things you possess. Look past any insecurities, scrutiny, shortcomings and anything else that may cause you to alter your perception of who you truly are. Continue in perseverance in your faith. At the end of the day, Christ is all that matters. The world and its opinions of you change from day to day, but His word never fails; His love never fails. Give in to the purposes of the Kingdom and ignore the criticisms of the day. Challenge yourself. Live fully and listen to His still, small voice. Remember the gifts, talents and abilities you were born to do, all you have are tools to work with but let Christ instruct you on how to use those most effectively. You are beautiful, worthy, talented, strong and bold! Always look forward. Sometimes the objects in the mirror of our past may look closer than they appear, but they are just that: our past. Love you so much and believe in you more than I can articulate on this page. I leave you with two quotes, both I am sure you have heard:
